I just got one of my wisdom teeth pulled out last Friday. Local anesthesia, pfft, whatever…

I thought one of these would hurt really bad (in a OMGWTF sort of way), but nah. It was so fucking epic though, because it turns out the problematic wisdom tooth was growing horizontally. The doctor had to break that tooth down into several pieces with a drillbit and shitloads of water, and pull it out with some sort of scalpel, a hammer, a 12 foot long rope and a fucking gigantic tractor beam usually found in an intergalactic starship to pull those bits and pieces of tooth from the cavity where it used to be. Here’s an artist impression of what the operation looked like.

I admit I was a bit liberal with the term ‘artist impression’. Sure, it wasn’t that epic and it sure wasn’t set in space with a badass dark lord and a whinging farmboy, whatever, but the fact that I was rocking out to MGMT on my iPod when my tooth was being ripped apart by a fucking huge drillbit, that’s something. For one, it kills off the sound of the drillbit pounding through my molar (which was OMGWTF scary, to be honest), and secondly it calmed me down when I thought the doctor was going to destroy my whole mouth with nuclear explosives down the hole he digged with his orthodontic drillbit, Armageddon style. Fuck.

The doctor gave me prescription to a lot of painkillers, which was totally awesome. But fuck that, I don’t need painkillers to kill off the pain, because it’s not even painful in the first place. I guess the doctor was so good he didn’t hit a nerve or does something stupid like leaving a tooth-shrapnel behind. Oh, let’s hope he didn’t, by the way, because that would terribly suck.

And it didn’t suck because I was up and running by Saturday morning. Fully functional with most definite awesomeness. Sweet.