I hate Bundies

I'm not a huge drinker, but during the past few years, I've tasted a variety of beverages. Some appealed to me from the very first sip, some tasted quite nice at the first sip, but quickly turned ugly after a few drinks, and so forth. Here is a list of drinks that I avoid. Some I can't really avoid because of its ubiquitous nature, while some I would only drink once and never again.

Smirnoff Vodka: Drinking shots in a drinking game is fun. It's fun when everyone's drunk off their ass, but it's not fun when I'm the only guy getting pissed in the room. It's also not fun when I always get shitty cards and have to end up chugging dozens of shots. Aside from that, I find drinking Vodka in any form is bad for the mouth and the stomach, even when mixed with Coke or Lime juice. There's that ugly burning feeling in the back of my throat and the ever present feeling of wanting to throw up. I try to avoid these.

Carlton Draught: After 4 years of uni, where 3 years of it was spent at South Lawn scrounging for free keg beer at BBQs, I find Carltons to be distasteful. I once thought that this was the best drink in the world, better than Teh Botol. I guess I just had way too many of these. Be it during geology field trips, faculty BBQ, a visit to the local student-pub, or anywhere in and around the university, Carltons are everywhere. It's ridiculous. The good thing about chugging a lot of these is that it actually increased my tolerance for drinking beer. I find that I can drink a tall glass of Carlton in under 30 seconds now, which is pretty impressive compared to this time last year. I also learned that I shouldn't drink too much of these before lectures, which I have done quite often in the last few years of uni. Maybe if I stop doing that, I could actually get more H1s. Whatever.

Bundaberg: Or Bundies, for short. I have unfond memories of Bundies. The first time was at the mega-day-long-bbq at the end of semester last year. I destroyed 3 cans in less than 10 minutes, kudos to the engineering kids who figured out that poking a hole at the bottom of the can increased the flow of liquid substantially. As a result, I visited the library a few hours later, trying to get that shitty stuff out of my stomach. Unpleasant. The second time was at geology camp, where there was a mix of Bundies, Goon, Gin and Carlton in one tall glass. It tasted quite nice, to be honest. Afterwards, not so much.

Goon: Box wine. Pretty much the worst shit I have ever tasted. It's undescribable really, aside from the fact that it's like drinking motor oil mixed with a glass of rotten apple juice that's been left out in the sun for days. Even the Germans thinks that it's the worst drink ever. That should give you a good idea as to how bad it is. Avoid. And oh, by the way, it happens to be incredibly cheap at around 2.5 a litre. That's right, two dollars and fifty cents for a litre of box wine with up to 15% alcohol content. If you want to quickly get smashed in the shortest amount of time, and being economic (i.e. tight ass) at the same time, get yourself one of these.

Melbourne Bitter: A bit like Carlton Draught. I hate the colours. It's red.. and light gold brown thing. And by colours, I mean the colours of the packaging. Yes, I'm that shallow.

Cascade: Any variants. Tastes like water. I don't get it, if you want to have a drink, please drink something that actually tastes like.. something.

Corona: I find Corona to be much too girlish for my taste. It doesn't have that EDGE, you know. That KICK. And yes, I have to type both of them in caps.

Guiness: Seriously, what the fuck is up with Guiness? It's pitch black and tastes so damn bitter. And the fact that it's black doesn't help either. For one, I don't know what the hell's underneath that surface of black stuff. For all I know, there could be toenails or hair or some shit. If it tastes good, it might not be much of a problem (i.e. Rawon has a black soup, but at least you know what's in there and it tastes so damn good), but Guiness is just.. weird. It's not bad. It's just a bafflingly weird drink.

Cocktails: I am a man, etc.

So now you ask me, what do I like to drink? I'm sorry, but I don't drink beer because I have realised that it's a waste of time and money. Plus, it's not that good for your health and religion says it's wrong and and and and..

Just kidding. I like Kirin Asahi, Bintang, Beck's and a couple of random Asian beers that I've tasted somewhere but forgotten the name. So if you want to impress me, all you have to do is buy me a six pack of one of those (or a combination thereof), and I'll praise you for the rest of my life. Maybe not for the rest of my life, more like a month or so. But eh..